Thursday, January 18, 2007

Horoscope

As you may know, I read Rob Brezny's Free Will Astrology horoscope each week. It is always entertaining. And sometimes, like this week, it can be maddening.

"When are your cats old enough to learn about Jesus?" asks The Onion, America's finest newspaper. Think about that question for a while, Aries. Then, once you've worked yourself up into a riddle-solving frame of mind, move on to these other, more pressing brain-teasers: When will you finally be old enough to figure out what you want to do when you grow up? When will it be the right time to reveal your secret super-powers to the world? How long are you going to wait before you get around to being completely committed to what you were born to do?

I ask you, is the man trying to make me crazy? If he wanted to be helpful he would answer the question for me.

3 comments:

Epiphany Alone said...

No, that's what he'd do if he wanted to make you laugh and laugh about how horoscopes are bullshit ;)

Kicking N. Screaming said...

"This...is the central scrutinizer..." He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. He wonders why you're reading his horoscopes when you could busy purchasing ad space on the A train. Seriously, are those spaces completely outrageously expensive? People knit on the train...they probably run out of yarn while on the train...for some reason I woke up thinking about that today.

Delphi said...

Your inner ad executive coming out. I suspect they are expensive. AM New York is a free newspaper here and their ads are pretty pricey considering. But I am going to put up some posters. I was going to do it last month but I’m glad I didn’t. They repainted all the light poles in the neighborhood so all the posters got ripped down. Would have been a waste.